Mohandas Gandhi was
an Indian lawyer, anti-colonial nationalist and political ethicist who employed
nonviolent resistance to lead the successful campaign for India's independence
from British rule. He inspired movements for civil rights and freedom across
the world.
Ghandi wrote: “I learnt the lesson of nonviolence from my
wife, when I tried to bend her to my will. Her determined resistance to my
will, on the one hand, and her quiet submission to suffering my stupidity…., on
the other, ultimately made me ashamed of myself and cured me of my stupidity in
thinking that I was born to rule over her and, in the end, she became my
teacher in nonviolence.”
Even
Ghandi, one of the many spiritual teachers of nonviolence, had conflict in his
personal life, and had to find a way to cope with and learn from it. Conflict is a natural normal part of the
human condition. If we are in any kind
of relationship—at work creating a product, in a congregation developing a budget,
in a friendship deciding on where to go eat, we will be in some sort of conflict
at one point or another. How we approach
conflict, how we manage our emotions while in conflict, and how we bring our
spirituality into the conflict determines whether the conflict will ultimately
be resolved in a healthy and satisfying way.
I believe there are ways of resolving conflict without the damaging
effects of anger or rage; I believe in a faith-centered, nonviolent way of
resolving conflict that includes the co-creation of a resolution using mind,
heart, spirit, and humility.
This is from The
Road Less Traveled by psychiatrist and author M. Scott Peck:
“There are two ways to confront or criticize
another human being; with instinctive and spontaneous certainty that one is
right, or with a belief that one is probably right arrived at through
scrupulous self-doubting and self-examination.
The first is the way of arrogance; it is the most common way of parents,
spouses, teachers, and people generally in day-to-day affairs; it is usually
unsuccessful, producing more resentment than growth and other effects that were
not intended. The second way is the way
of humility; it is not as common, requiring as it does a genuine extension of
oneself; it is more likely to be successful…”
Before
I go more deeply in discussing nonviolent resistance, I think it is important
to acknowledge that political and social conflict can feel so much bigger than
day-to-day conflict. And that so many of
us are burned-out, fatigued, and overwhelmed with the state of our culture and
politics right now. So many of us are
asking, “What can one person or even a small group of people possibly do to
change societal norms or state laws?” In
our world right now, there is so much hate, resentment, polarization, it is
challenging to even decide where to put our energy or what to resist. We only
have so much political power and physical, mental and emotional energy. There are so many issues, just here in
Florida that cry out for resistance—restrictions on Woman’s Reproductive Rights
and LGBTQ Rights. Making gun ownership
easier, without even requiring any kind of training on safe use of a
firearm. Restricting access in schools
to certain books and to the history of African Americans in this country. Restricting medically necessary supports for
the transgender community. Where and how
do we use nonviolent resistance to confront these issues? It is easy to get frustrated, angry, scared,
overwhelmed, even paralyzed by so many issues.
“Yes!” Magazine
reporting Fellow Melissa Hellman considered what civil disobedience at Standing
Rock teaches us:
“Resistance is bolstered in our divine
identity that resists the seduction of the darkness in ourselves and in the
temptation and lies that a proto-fascist system might throw at us. Resistance
at Standing Rock is a spiritual and moral act as well as an environmental and
political act…
We can be part of an organized mass movement
of non-violent protest grounded in the deepest spiritual principles of
compassion, modeled on Martin Luther King, Jr, the Dalai Lama, Gandhi, and
Polish labor activist, Lech Walesa. Such a resistance that holds a high moral
ground is blessed by invisible powers and has an extraordinary capacity to
shift the situation.”
As
a minister, I am called to speak with both a prophetic voice—telling you and
those in power the truth as I see it—and a pastoral voice—giving comfort to
those who are suffering as well as hope for what the future might bring. I do not avoid speaking truth, whether it be
in front of political leaders or in a congregational committee meeting, even as
I understand that the truth may be difficult to hear, even if the truth may
result in conflict. But speaking truth
must be tempered with a humble spirit, my own self-reflection, and a
willingness to be open to engage with and listen to those to whom I am
speaking. Just telling them that they are wrong, or that they are racist, or
that they are fascist will not result in them changing their hearts and
mind. By being willing to understand how
they came to their truths and made their decisions, I can begin a process of
communication that can result in change.
Nonviolent resistance isn’t always about rallies and petitions, it is
also interpersonal engagement for change.
Mohandas K. Gandhi
wrote:
“If someone with courage and vision can rise
to lead in nonviolent action, the winter of despair can, in the twinkling of an
eye, be turned into the summer of hope. Nonviolence is not a garment to put on
and off at will. Its seat is in the heart, and it must be an inseparable part
of our being. Nonviolence, which is a quality of the heart, cannot come by an
appeal to the brain. It is a plant of slow growth, growing imperceptibly, but
surely.”
“Nonviolence
is not a garment to put on and off at will.”
I want to repeat that because I believe that in order to participate in
nonviolent resistance nonviolence has to be braided into your character, your
thoughts, words, and deeds. Nonviolence
is not just outwardly focused on the issues we are facing in society. It’s also inwardly focused on how we are with
ourselves, with those we love, with those in our communities and congregations,
with those around us as we live and move through life. I will admit right up front that I am not
perfect at being nonviolent in all that I do, but I aspire to it always, in my
thoughts, words and deeds. Being
nonviolent does not means my life is without conflict—whether in my marriage,
in congregational committee meetings, or in working with those in political
action networks or non-profits who are trying to make this world a better place
for all. It does mean I think, speak and
live my truth with peace in my heart and compassion for all those with whom I
come into
Recently
I spoke with an African American minister and the South Dade Branch of the
NAACP president. I was talking with them
about allyship on issues that were coming down from Tallahassee. Without hesitation I spoke on the many issues
that I felt passionately about, including transgender rights. I also said that I and many of the people I
knew in the congregation and in other groups that I am affiliated with would
look to them, the African American community, to take the lead on issues of
importance to them. Both the minister
and the president of the local NAACP said that transgender issues would be
issues that not a lot of African American churches or members of the NAACP
would easily be able to rally around. On
the other hand, they didn’t want other people’s rights restricted. After much discussion and periods of silence,
they said they might be willing to help with transgender issues if they
believed that we would stand beside them when they fought for this issues that
were important to them—we being, white people, LGBTQ people, and women. Neither the minister nor the local president
of the NAACP Branch felt like there had been a history of non-black people
standing with them when they were in need, when they were fighting for their
rights. They told me trust would have to
be built. I assured the local NAACP
president that I would rally those I knew when he was in need. I have joined the NAACP and plan to attend
some of their witness events. As our
conversation came to a close, I hoped that he would find a way to be an ally to
some of the issues that I felt passionate about. He didn’t say yes, but he didn’t say
no. I believe that I had planted a seed
and trust that will have to be nurtured by my following up on my words with
actions. Who know how this see will
grow? I believe its potential is
unlimited. This interaction we shared,
with peace in our hearts and a willingness to engage, is as much nonviolent
resistance as holding a Black Lives Matter Rally.
My
friends, having this Black Lives Matter sign in our church and on our property,
even if it is covered up
and having this LGBTQ flag in our church and
flying in front of our building, are acts of nonviolent resistance. I’ll tell you a story about a member of my
congregation in Naperville, IL who had the same LGBTQ flag in front of his home
in a very conservative neighborhood. You
know a lot of Make American Great signs.
This was his own act of nonviolent resistance. Over time some of the people who lived near
him, asked him about his flag and he gladly talked about it and why it was
important to him. Some of his neighbors
began to display LGBTQ flags. Eventually
in his conservative neighborhood, there were five, six, seven flags waving in
support of the LGBTQ community. All of
them practicing nonviolent resistance.
We,
as the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Miami, practice nonviolent
resistance. Our Unitarian Universalist
Principals call us to treat everyone with respect, with compassion, with
equity. On our cars are bumper stickers
like Hate Has No Home Here and Abortion is Health Care. We educate ourselves on the issues facing the
marginalized, the handicapped, people of color, women, children, the homeless,
returning citizens. We sign petitions,
attend rallies, write letters to the editor, hold discussions. For over 3 years we have worked to Decenter
Whiteness in our governance at this church.
I have preached on nonviolent communication and modeled nonviolent
communication and behaviors both in the congregation and in my public
initiatives. In the short time I have been here, even with the extreme
impedances that COVID and quarantine that shut down this congregation, we have
built relationships with allies, including interfaith and intercultural
groups. Some of us have volunteered at
Planned Parenthood and have talked to state and local legislators. These are all ways of embodying nonviolent
resistance.
How
can you express nonviolent resistance?
How can you hold space for authentic discussions and sharing of truths
with those in your sphere of influence?
I can’t answer questions for you, but I bet you have some ideas. How will you make a positive difference,
resisting racism, and any other oppression here in Miami, while keeping a
humble, compassionate heart and an open mind, ready to engage with people who
may be different than you? These are the
questions that each of us must ask ourselves and reflect on before we work to
stem the tide of oppression here in Florida.
And I can’t wait to see how you answer them.
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